After nearly 20 years of a contemptuous relationship, I just can't deal with it any longer. It's not me, it's you. Your high maintenance lifestyle has just pushed me over the edge. You always need to have the latest and greatest. I get you the latest and BAM the next day you need something newer. I'm sorry, but after catching untold number of viruses from you and cleaning up all your messes, I am done.
Yes, I know that things will be different. You are familiar to me. I know everything there is about you. Unfortunately, so does the rest of the world. I may fumble in my new relationship. I may not even know how to turn on my new friend, but rest assured the journey of discovery will be worth it.
Goodbye Microsoft Windows, you can reach me over at Mac's house.